Teething, Need I Say More?

Squishy has started teething. She has been bemoaning her current situation at all hours of the day and night. She slept fairly well for the first half of last night but as soon as the Tylenol wore off she was waking frequently. Ask me how excited I am. She is trying like hell to sit up on her own. She's getting pretty good but I think it will take a while. She is not tiny so that is a lot of body for her to learn to balance.

In other news, we're moving! We found a house in the area that is reasonably priced with which we can all live. It's an older home but it has enough room so that Squishy has a room, Daddy and I have a room, Doodles and C have 2 rooms and Daddy has an office. I think I am going to take over part of the office for my craft stuff. The best part? It has a washer and dryer!!! YAY!!!!!!!!!!! We start moving Tuesday, but we have all of August to move. I should be packing right now, but I'm feeling lazy.

What else is new... I made some awesome cupcakes. Nana bought me Martha Stewart's Cupcakes while she was visiting so I tried one of the recipes. I made Brown Sugar Pound Cake with Brown Butter Icing. They are delicious. Daddy thinks they are a little too sweet but he never had much of a sweet tooth.

Tall Ships, Visit from Nana, Mommy Brain

We have had a fun weekend. Nana came for a visit and we went to see the Tall Ships in Halifax yesterday. Nana just left and Squishy is still asleep.

My brain is a little fried. I keep trying to write another "real" post but I can't seem to wrap my head around any of my thoughts long enough to compose something worth reading. Mom says that this will get better in time but I think "Mommy Brain" is going to be something I have to battle on a daily basis for a long time.

I've also been neglecting my crafts. I keep trying to start things, but I get 10 minutes in to a project and I lose track of what I am doing or where I am going with the idea. I have 3 strands of finger knitting that I thought I was going to turn into something but I forget what. I have lots of yarn that needs to be knit or crocheted into something and I have TONS of polymer clay.

Oh well. Soon enough I will have more help around the house and I will hopefully use that time for crafty goodness.

Help PartSelect donate $10,000 to Breast Cancer Research & You Could Win!

Part Select, an online appliance parts retailer, is running an amazing contest. Check out the Paint Your Appliance Pink contest site or the Facebook Group for more details. The gist of it is that for every entry they will donate $25 to breast cancer research (up to $10,000) and you will be entered for a draw for awesome prizes.

The above picture is my first entry. There may or may not be more.

Home Again

We are back in NS after an extended vacation in NB. We are slowly recuperating. We had a great time. First we visited SIL in Maine so that she could spend some quality time with her "Fairy God-Child" and then we left Squishy in the care of her Nana while Mommy and Daddy took some time to themselves at The Camp.

I was petrified of spending my first night without my baby. I wasn't worried about her, since my mother did a fantastic job raising me, I was worried about me. I missed her so much! I didn't want to turn in to an emotional wreck worried about every little thing. I was worried that she wouldn't take the formula, or that she would forget how to breastfeed. I wanted her first night without Mommy to go smoothly so that Nana wouldn't be scarred for life and might agree to do that again. I worried needlessly. Squishy was on her best behavior and slept. I managed not to make Daddy drive to F'ton in the middle of the night to check that Squishy was sleeping.

Doodles and C joined us for the weekend. It rained. We did not go swimming even though Squishy had her first dip in The Lake just days before. We did go to the aquarium and we went to town to visit the shops.

When we went to pick Squishy up from Nana's I was surprised by how much she had grown in only a few days. She looked so much bigger and older. She's not quite my little baby any more. She didn't forget how to breastfeed, and she maintained a healthy appetite while she was with Nana. I don't think I'll ever have to worry about her not eating. She is her father's daughter and Grampy's granddaughter.

Babies...

I knew it wouldn’t last forever. I have been harbouring a secret resentment whenever anyone comments on how well-behaved my baby is or how quiet she is. I would mentally knock on wood every time someone mentioned how she is sleeping.

They have cursed me. She has gone from being the “perfect” baby to being a real baby. One who cries, wakes repeatedly in the night, won’t settle down, hates being held but refuses to be put down.

Sure, right now she is playing quietly with her jungle mat, she recently learned how to make the tiger sing, but I can sense the storm brewing beneath the surface. I can hear her gears grinding, preparing for the inevitable.

I knew this was what I signed on for, I was prepared for it but that doesn’t make it any easier. I spend a good part of my day frustrated, tired and ready to snap, but the moment she smiles or laughs either at me or at her daddy all of that melts away. I never knew I could love one person so much. I always knew I was patient but I never knew that she would test the limits of my patience and that they would hold. I never knew I could be this tired and still run when she needs me. I knew I would love being a mother but I never knew that I would be able to hinge my identity on simple motherhood. This little person makes my world a better place.

Choice again

Wahoo! The abortion debate is hot in NB again and as usual I have something to say about it.

First, I apologize to a friend of mine for saying this since he has a personal connection but NB Health Minister Mike Murphy needs to resign. Sorry Mr. Murphy but your personal beliefs CANNOT interfere with your duty to ensure that everyone in NB has access to safe medical procedures and that those necessary procedures are paid for by Medicare. This includes a woman’s right to a safe abortion. It is not your place to allow anyone’s personal opinions to interfere with health care. I respect your right to hold opinions and I am not going to tell you that you are wrong but when your beliefs prevent you from upholding your duty as an elected official you need to step down and allow someone without that conflict of interests to do the job.

Aside from Mr. Murphy’s ridiculous statement the NB Appeals Courts has paved the way for Dr. Morgentaler to sue the NB government for payment of abortions provided in his clinic. The reason this is important is that the NB Gov’t has been claiming that only a woman who has had an abortion in the Fredericton clinic can sue for Medicare to cover the cost. No woman has stepped forward to sue so Dr. Morgantaler has taken it upon himself to do so in her absence.

As I was getting ready to finish this post I heard the news about Dr. George Tiller. I am deeply saddened at the loss of one of the few doctors in the US willing to practice late-term abortions. This just emphasizes the fact that though the fight for abortion rights is still a battle violence is never the answer.

I Can Haz Jorb?

I had my first post-baby job interview on Friday. I walked into the interview under the impression that I would not want the job, but now I think I would love it. It sounded challenging, exciting and fun. The only problem is that Husband is now fairly sure that he wants to stay in NS. So I'm continuing the hunt.

The interview was a strange experience. It's the first time I have been asked about my family in an interview. I was able to talk about what Husband does, how my daughter is growing and our plans for the future. I felt old. I'm not sure what my chances of landing a second interview with the company are. I felt good about how the initial interview went but I lack executive assistant experience. I was one of 12 picked for interviews out of 200 applicants. That alone feels like an accomplishment.

I am going to continue hunting both in NS and in NB and see what happens. I know I will find something but I am taking my time and being picky this time.

Grumpasaurus Regina...

The Squishy I knew and loved is gone. She has been replaced with a Grumpasaurus Regina. She does not want to be alone, but she doesn't want to play. She is sleeping through the night, but refuses to take naps in the afternoon.

Yay babies!

Hunting for the Elusive Career...

I'm starting to think I should have begun career planning when I was still in university. I am at a huge disadvantage due to my complete and total lack of tangible skills. I have a lot of skills that are intangible, however how well can you demonstrate an ability to learn new skills on a resume? Therein lies my problem.

I am still hunting for a career. I've been offered my old job back, the one at the Portrait Studio, but I need something with more hours and more room for advancement. The job market in small town NS is slim pickings for someone with a BA and no practical skills.

I have applied for a few jobs in the 'Fax and in the F'ton area but I'm not sure if Husband wants to move, or wants to watch me commute every day. All I know is that I do not want to wait tables or work in a restaurant again. I thought I was done with that when I graduated.

Back to the grind

Now that Squishy is getting bigger and more independent I am starting to think about life outside the home again. Husband and I have been discussing me going back to work to allow him to take parental leave. This had been our initial plan before I was laid off but since I wasn’t able to find a “real” job after I was let go we have just planned for me to stay home since we need his income.
The only problem with my job hunt is that I don’t think I will find a job in our area. This isn’t entirely bad. Husband and I both want to move back to the homeland to be closer to our families. I have been looking for work back in F’ton where I think I have the best chance of finding something I will like. I think it will take some time for me to find a job where I will be able to use my talents. I would desperately love to do something in the non-profit sector that involves online marketing or publication and promotions, but I think I have to start in administration again.